lamentations

Over the past couple of weeks, God’s really been hitting at the core of what drives me, where I run to gain satisfaction, attention, or affirmation- places that are not Him. In a lot of my attitudes, actions, decisions, and desires, He shown me my overwhelming selfishness- and what that has shown me more than anything is that I hate sin. I hate that I love it. I hate that I daily live out Proverbs 26:11. I hate that I run to it, knowing it leaves me empty. But I’m so thankful it leaves me empty, I’m thankful Jesus allows nothing else to fill me beside Himself- because it teaches me constantly that I was created to know and glorify Him, and only in fulfilling that purpose will I ever be satisfied.

So this is becoming my prayer:
God, although I cling so tightly and am deceived so greatly by my own flesh, work my sin out of me, replacing it with Yourself. You are the Giver of every good thing, the Creator of my heart, the ultimate Lover of my soul. Your plan is perfect and is lacking in nothing; my plans are full of compromise and lies. Don’t let me forget the feeling that comes when I settle for cheap imitations of the contentment found only in Jesus Christ, filled with grace and love. Teach me that the wages of sin is death, separation from you; but Your gift is eternal life in Christ- a life that is abundantly good, because You are able to do far more than we ask or imagine. Whisper the Gospel over and over to my soul; tenderize my heart and train it only to run to You.